cried when I read this. For those who wish we will be happy to burn a candle in your name on May 24th. Please send you r r equests to with the initials of the person you wish to burn the candle for. If you wish to make a brief statement it will be shared with those in atten dan ce. We will be happy to honor your request.





i read that on the night of bowen's judicial committee there will be a candlelight vigil in the town for all who wish to see an end to innocent young abuse victims being threatened with disfellowshipping if they tell


i cried


i cried for my sister ... raped by a temporary (auxillary) pioneeer, who was a close friend of my brother (now a bethel elder) .... she was only trying to come into the truth like her big brothers ... trying to attend meetings ... go in the field ... to study ... trying to ONLY associate with jehovah s people , instead of those "evil worldly people....bad associations"


i cried for my sister again .... along with my littlest brother ... because when the two of them stopped studying and coming to meetings ...and my brother and i .....we were too busy with our new "family" spending all our spare time going to meetings... studies... door to door ... assemblies ... and conventions...we were too busy doing god s work to notice or worry that our step father used the older siblings being away to take advantage of those two children


i cried for both my EXes ....raised in the truth....molested by their fathers repeatedly....honoring their parents...the inner turmoil they had ...which finally took it s toll on them...tearing them apart


i cried for my daughter ... horribly abused by her stepmother...with me at first to blinded by the "truth" to see it...until it was too late


i cried that i was stupid enough to try to salvage that marriage .... believing everything that the naysayers in this guestbook also so ardently believe...that jehovah's earthly representatives...guided by holy spirit could and would fix it....


i cried that i furthered my childrens pain trying to make them "wait on jehovah" too...


i cried that i got in trouble for getting my daughter away from her abuser and considered it "discipline from jehovah"


i cried when i remember how the elders treated me and my children for wanting them to take action against a second generation child ab user who remained in good standing....


and i cried when i thought of all the slander they perpetrated against my family for finally putting a child s welfare above that of not rocking the theocratic boat...


and i cried that i believed i was developing a "bad attitude" like they said...and followed the bible s advise to "call upon the older men" to help restore my waning faith and spiritual sickness....the same ones who didn t give a shit about my children...and further proved it by refusing to make sheparding calls on either me or my kids....


i cried that i furthered the pain of my children by continuing to take them to meetings, etc. when i just needed to take them away.....


i cried in shame for my part of co-dependence in this theocratic family


i cried when i remember the actual letter i received from the watchtower bible and tract society...the governing body...telling me to put my spouse above my children


and i cried in empathy for other families who have taken a stand for the children....who put actual truth above saying we are "in the truth"...and are now being administered "jehovah s loving discipline" by being disfellowhipped


and i cried for you people, who continue to harangue the truth-tellers....knowing exactly how you feel....because i used to feel the same way...and i wonder how many of you might actually be victims yourselves ...or have family that are...and realize that you are saying the same things that the ab user s are?...the same thing that the leadership(in the congregations and the headquarters) are saying?


i cried because i know that my family and i will not be able to be there....with our own candles


i would like to ask for volunteers to burn special candles for each victim in my family...since we cannot attend at this time


it would mean a lot